Life in the SLO Lane

Note: This column was originally published Monday, March 10, 2008, on the Daily Nexus website.

Issue 94 / Volume 88

If you are looking for a one-day escape, consider heading up to San Luis Obispo. It has options for everyone, whether you and your significant other are heading off for some time together, or you are just exploring with your friends. I know most UCSB students do not tend to travel to the home of Cal Poly. Don’t let sports rivalries stop you though, because SLO is definitely worth exploring.

The main drag in SLO is Higuera Street and is analogous to State Street. It is very pedestrian-oriented and riddled with shops and restaurants. Unlike State Street, though, where most everything is located on one long thoroughfare, the downtown district of SLO is spread out between Higuera and Marsh Street to the south and Monterey to the north. You can find sizable parking garages on Marsh and also on Palm Street.

When it’s time for lunch, you can find some wallet-friendly restaurants near campus, but don’t fall into the Woodstock’s rut, try something new. My favorite eatery is Firestone Grill. It generally is packed to the rafters with students on weekends because it serves a mean pulled-pork sandwich called “The Pig Sandwich.” In addition, the restaurant serves a number of standard grill-type foods, including burgers and fries. Be careful though, as timing is everything at Firestone’s, avoid stopping by at peak lunch and dinner times to avoid Disneyland-caliber lines. If you get hungry before two, and you want a turkey sandwich, head to the House of Bread for one of the best turkey sandwiches in existence, maybe even better than those of the immortal Silvergreens.

After lunch, head back to Higuera for more exploring and make sure to head all the way down toCheap Thrills on the far end. It sounds sketchy, I know, but it is easily the highlight of any day in San Luis. With three floors of used and new music, DVDs, comic books and video games, Cheap Thrills has something for everyone. While you wander around this emporium of wares, you might be wondering where you too could get some spiffy posters, door beads or other decorations. For this you can travel to their sister store, The Sub, where they deal in all types of decorative items from wall size posters to giant dragons for your coffee table.

Before heading out of town, be sure to stop in at the monstrous Madonna Inn. Dinner here is far too expensive, but using the restroom is not. The Madonna Inn provides some of the most unique powder rooms on the planet. It is not uncommon to pass women coming out of the men’s room after gawking at the waterfall that doubles as a urinal in the men’s room. On your way out, consider swinging by the café to at least look at, or maybe even try one of their huge and delicious slices of cake.

Finally, after a fun filled day of buying or just browsing, depending on your level of self-control, you can head towards Avila Beach for a relaxing and romantic evening at the Sycamore Springs Resort. They have a number of small natural spring hot tubs that can be reserved by the hour. While the price is a little steep, it is definitely worth it as you are provided with a secluded tub underneath the oaks and with a view of the stars. Whether you behave yourself and keep those swim suits on is of course, none of my business.

The DL on Disneyland: Part Deux

Note: This column was originally published March 4, 2008 on the Daily Nexus website.

After visiting Disney’s California Adventure the previous day, head into the park when it opens at eight for shorter lines at those rides you are dying to get on. Sure, the newest ride in the park the Finding Nemo Submarine Voyage is interesting, but check out some less appreciated aspects of the park. After you have braved the two-hour line (at least) at Nemo, remember to expand beyond the realm of major rides.

Disney has certain employees distributed throughout the park, giving out Dreams as part of “The Year of a Million Dreams” promotion. This can translate into free meals, fast passes or even a night in the “Dream Suite” above Pirates of the Caribbean. I wouldn’t hold your breath for the dream suite, though, as it is only given to one guest per day. In order to score the less extravagant prizes, keep your eyes peeled for employees wearing collared shirts and khaki pants. If you approach them and make nice conversation (winking at them may help), they will probably offer you one of their prizes.

If you are looking for a way to impress your date, head for the railroad and sneakily ask one of the conductors for a tender ride. Not tender that way, but tender, as in the car behind the train engine. It is equipped with a small two-person seat that puts you right into the engine with the fireman and engineer. You can also ask to drive the riverboat around Tom Sawyer’s Island. If you board the boat early, climb as fast as you can to the “wheel house” and ask if you can steer. If there is no one else up there, you should be able to, no problem.

As a big fan of comedy and fried cheese, I would highly recommend the Golden Horseshoe Saloon for its huge fried mozzarella sticks and great shows. A variety of different “wild west” themed shows run here in the Golden Horseshoe, and my personal favorite is Billy Hill and the Hillbillies. This brief comedy/variety show is one of the funniest things in Disneyland and is a great time to rest your feet while chowing down on some deep fried goodness. If you do plan to have a seat, though, arrive at least 30 minutes early, and send one of your compañeros to snag a table while you wait in line.

If you like fireworks, Disneyland is absolutely one of the best places to see them. With a budget of $33,000 per showing, this fireworks display is enough to make any Fourth of July show pale in comparison. Supposedly, the best place to view the show is from the “hub” where the Walt and Mickey statue is. Personally, I never had the patience – or courage – to battle through tired and irritated parents wielding strollers to get to this prized viewing location. All I can tell you is that you absolutely need to be within the roundabout to get the full effect of the show. If you are going in the winter, remember that Disneyland only shows their fireworks on weekends.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not arguing that you should visit and totally ignore staples like the Matterhorn and the recently remodeled Space Mountain. By all means, go for the rides, but when the line for Pirates of the Caribbean wraps all the way around the park, try one of these lesser-known but also fantastic excursions. If anything, at least you will have a relatively different Disneyland Facebook album than your other friends.

The DL on Disneyland Part One

Note: This column was originally published on February 26, 2008 on the Daily Nexus website.

Have you ever been dying to get out of Isla Vista? For a weekend, a day or just an afternoon? Do you want to explore and experience something different? Every week in this column, I will bring you escapes from everyday life – some large, some small, some cheap, some not, but all a ton of fun.

First stop, the Disneyland Resort in Anaheim. Where else can you escape the world better than to the “Happiest Place on Earth?” Now is a great time to go, because Disneyland is offering a deal for Southern California residents, in which a single day admission ($66) pays for one day each at Disneyland and Disney’s California Adventure.

After cruising south to Anaheim, the first inclination might be to rush into Disneyland. Instead, head into Disneyland’s next-door neighbor, Disney’s California Adventure, and enjoy shorter lines for a more mature set of rides. You will find rides like California Screamin’, the only inverted ride at the resort, and the Tower of Terror, which promises to shock and delight, no matter how many times you ride it.

If you are not one for thrill rides, go for the more subtle excitement with some of the amazing shows and exhibits. Start with the Disney Animation exhibit, which sounds and looks lame from the outside but is actually very impressive. You can see some of the original animation from your favorite films, learn to draw characters and see the Toy Story Zoetrope, a sculpture version of a flipbook. This model is one of only three in existence and spins once per second, 60 times per minute to give the effect of animation before your very eyes.

Turtle Talk with Crush is, by far, the best aspect of this attraction, because it gives you the opportunity to interact with the character in real time from the safety of the “human tank.” Make sure to catch the Aladdin show, as well; this 40-minute play is a hilarious break from walking and waiting in line. The highlight of the show is Genie, who constantly cracks jokes about current events. (On Valentine’s Day, he even asked Jafar to be his Valentine, only to receive brutal rejection, I’m afraid.) The 3D shows are also quite cool and are a frequently overlooked aspect of the park. Muppet*Vision 3D, in which cannonballs fly out of the screen, explosions blast everywhere and the always entertaining Muppet hecklers lean out to mock the show and the audience. (Don’t take it personally; they’re just robots.) Though many of the shows are good, do not go to Golden Dreams, starring Whoopi Goldberg. It is absolutely excruciating, and unless you are a card-carrying member of her fan club, there is no reason to waste the time.

California Adventure closes earlier than Disneyland, and you will undoubtedly be hungry after such an action-packed day. Peruse the novelty restaurants inside Downtown Disney for a livelier atmosphere and delicious dishes. If you are willing to drop about $20 to $30 per person, check out the ESPN Zone or the Rainforest Café. You can save money by ordering a tantalizing appetizer or by ordering off the lunch menu instead of the dinner menu. ESPN Zone has huge TVs and an insane sports atmosphere, but I prefer the Rainforest Café for its better food and jungle ambience. (It is particularly exciting to get interrupted in your dinner by a huge tropical rainstorm and rampaging animals.) Meet me back here next week, same time, same place, for some insights into Disneyland itself.

Rivalries of Epic Proportions

Escape From IV: Extreme Edition

Let’s talk about the football. As you probably know, soccer — or as the rest of the world more logically calls it, football — is the biggest sport in the world outside of the United States. The passion for it varies between countries. In South Africa, for example, it is one of several sports that dominate the country. Compare this with England and Scotland, where the world’s best players come to compete in the two top tier leagues of Britain, the English and Scottish Premier Leagues.

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Thanksgiving Blues

Escape From IV: Extreme Edition

I just got off the phone with my Grandmother, who asked me what my plans are for Thanksgiving. When I told her that I didn’t have any, she was shocked.

“No one invited you over or anything?!” Unfortunately I had to remind her that no one celebrates Thanksgiving over here and that next Thursday will just be another day for me. It’s an absolute tragedy.

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Pour One Out

Escape From IV: Extreme Edition

Britain isn’t exactly known for its culinary delights, and Scotland even less so. There is not a whole lot you can say about the complexity of a culinary culture if the most famous signature dish called haggis, which involves stuffing a sheep stomach with everything else left over from the butchering process. Arguably worse is the prevalence of something called Black Pudding. When you think of pudding, you are most likely to imagine some sort of amazingly delicious chocolate dessert. In sharp contrast, Black pudding is made up primarily of blood, which is cooked until it congeals, and other sausage fillers like oatmeal and barley.

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The Irony of Guy Fawkes

Escape From IV: Extreme Edition

Remember remember the fifth of November

Gunpowder, treason and plot.

I see no reason why gunpowder, treason

Should ever be forgot…

It’s Guy Fawkes Day here in jolly ol’ Britain. It’s a day built around bottle rockets, bonfires, giant explosions and celebrates a day in 1605 when a group of gentlemen conspired to blow the houses of parliament sky high. Mr. Fawkes was caught sneaking around underneath parliament with a few dozen barrels of gunpowder and was subsequently tried and convicted of treason along with his co-conspirators.

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It’s a Revelection!!!

Scotland, it’s friendly, cold, wet, and absolutely fascinated by our election. With the day of reckoning just under a week away, it appears that Scots and most everyone else, is absolutely fascinated with our little democratic race.

I arrived into Glasgow Central Station on Sept. 8 and took a cab to my new apartment. The driver had all sorts of questions. It started out pretty standard.

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